Flung haphazardly on the couch
watch the ceiling fan spin while my stomach growls
got a safety pin (punx) where I used to have a button
reach into my pocket and I don't feel nothing
but a hole in the bottom is a metaphor
and I slump from the couch down to the floor
a person like me just can't get off
it's time for me to get a goddamn job
On the other side of town, there's always something going down
They buy artisanal toilet paper. See you at the tanning booth later
And on my side of town it's all dried-up dead and brown
I drain the last drop and the bottle's empty
the ghost of sobriety leaves my body
The bar's overstaffed and I can't get a shift
the boss is mad and the manager's pissed
the smoke leaves his lungs and he discards the butt
while I'm saving up two months for The Haircut
Cool Guy Jake and the Blackout Brigade
are going to them bars tonight. it's going to be real gay*
Huge fire ants take over my street. Next door neighbor is Lee Von Teves, if that tells you anything
Yeah on my side of town, where fire ants freckle the ground,
I drain the last drop and the bottle's empty
Ghost of sobriety leaving my body
*My dumb ass wrote this song in the summer of 2015 when I was 21, pretty soon after gay marriage was legalized in the U.S. For some reason I thought that would take the pejorative out of calling things gay. Obviously I was wrong.
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